Posted on May 24, 2009 at 11:02 pm It is embarrassing how I can't tell her. It's not like I cheated on her with another woman right? I just feel bad that she might find out about and not from me--and she would jump into the wrong conclusions and all. I mean she doesn't have to pay the debts with me right? I wouldn't wish that on her. I wonder how I can even start resolving this.

Posted on May 24, 2009 at 11:04 pm My oh my. Just tell her. Goodluck to you.

Posted on May 24, 2009 at 11:06 pm Yeah just tell her that you are in deep *sh - but you are going to take care of it. Unless by some miracle you get an inheritance from your long lost rich uncle...then she won't have to know at all...it would be all smooth like that

Posted on May 24, 2009 at 11:08 pm Why are you even scared of your wife?!!!

Posted on May 24, 2009 at 11:17 pm It's so hard to help you? So let me just rephrase your questions--let's see if we can help you then:1) You are asking what your first step is going to be- to eliminate your debt?2) How are you going to tell your wife about it or if you should tell her at all?3) If your relationship is going to survive this mess? 4) And why in the world are you feeling very guilty about it all?Correct?

Posted on May 24, 2009 at 11:21 pm Wow Spashley4ever--you a shrink?Hahaaa Kris man, this isn't the Oprah thread! Just go up to her and be straight about it. Expect that she's gonna b*- about it for a while. Let her. Girls are predictable like that.Tell her. Then from there. See if she'd help you fix the mess. If she doesn't then Spashley's question number 3 is answered! Simple!

Posted on May 24, 2009 at 11:38 pm  If you are in a committed relationship, debt is unavoidably a shared issue, so might as well sit her down for a serious talk. Even raising the funds to pay off your debt can be a shared task. Find out if she is going to be willing to help you out with things like:-a garage sale-selling a property-filing bankruptcyThose things would affect her that is why you are feeling hesitant but you will get over it and she would get over the shock. You really just have to go through with it.Also..do you live in a community property state?

Posted on May 24, 2009 at 11:40 pm I really think that you should tell her especially if you are thinking about taking out a loan from your home equity. taking out a loan from your home equity. If you are in a committed relationship, debt is unavoidably a shared issue, so might as well sit her down for a serious talk. Even raising the funds to pay off your debt can be a shared task. Find out if she is going to be willing to help you out with things like: -a garage sale -selling a property -filing bankruptcy Those things would affect her that is why you are feeling hesitant but you will get over it and she would get over the shock. You really just have to go through with it.Also..do you live in a community property state?